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Alala Fortis

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Alala Fortis Empty Alala Fortis

Post by Guest Thu Mar 27, 2014 6:31 pm

Name: Alala (Allie) Fortis

Age: 16

Divine Ancestry: Daughter of Mars

Mortal Family: Jessica Fortis, (mother) Hannah Fortis (younger sister)

Years in Camp: 4 years

Rank: Centurion

History: Allies mother Jessica first attracted Mars's attention when she was on duty in the air-force. He fell madly in love with her and she loved him back, after 12 months of being together Allie was born. They named her "Alala" meaning "Warlike." Jessica knew that Mars was a god that could not stay with her forever so she begged him to at least stay to see the birth of their daughter. He agreed, and was able to and give a blessing to newborn Allie. The blessing was so that she would master any weapon she practiced with in a short period of time. It was a wonderful blessing but it came with a downside too. Allie was going to have to live a life full of loss and hardship.
Allie's mother had another child with another man when Allie was 4 years old. Her mother gave birth to a beautiful baby named Hannah. Hannah was not a demigod, but her mother loved her equally.
Because of Jessica's military background she raised Allie to do drills every morning.(including mixed martial arts, push-ups gallore and mile runs every day) She was hard on them but Allie didn't mind, because after the drills they would go inside and make a delicious breakfast and laugh and have fun until they had to leave for school.
School was particularly challenging for Allie because of her dyslexia and ADHD. She hated school and was constantly looking forward to going home to practice her drills and hang out with her mom and toddler sister.
When Allie was 10 and Hannah was 6 the first monster attacked. The school day was just finishing when the Manticore attacked. Allie was immediately on guard when she say it in the hallway. It swung it's tail at her and she dodged (thanks to her training with the drills) the first missile missed her. She was thinking fast when a voice interrupted her thoughts.
"KITTY!" a little voice squealed. Hannah was standing at the other end of the hallway, her mother had sent her in to get Allie. The Manticore turned on her little sister. She sprinted all out to jump in front of her sister but not before the monster sent a missile flying towards the girl.
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Allie screamed charging the giant cat. She was lucky enough that the monster's back was towards her and she jumped up it. She stopped thinking and just attacked. She was able to get high enough up on the back of the Manticore that she could wrap her legs around it's throat. "ARGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!" She screamed attacking the monster and tearing at his fur. The Manticore collapsed and she jumped off of it. She ran to her sister but it was to late. Tears streaming down her face she looked up to see her mother in utter shock above her. She turned to where the Manticore had collapsed but all that was left was a trail of golden blood trickled along the floor and out the door at the other end of the hall.
That's when her mother started screaming. Allie tried to block out the sound. Confusion filled her brain. How had she done that? What had happened? Why was Hannah on the floor? The realization hit her like a baseball bat and she collapsed on the floor.
The police showed up five minutes later and were able to get her mother to a calmer state but all they could do for Allie was question her and give her a blanket for the shock. They decided that it was a freak gun accident and that the shooter got away but Allie knew what really happened.
Grief was constantly there in her home. Her mother stopped drilling her but she kept it up trying to grasp the one thing she could in her life. She drilled for hours on end and then would walk back into the house and try to take care of her mom. Anytime she wasn't in her house she was in the alley next to the house practicing wall jumping and other Parkour to be able to fight better next time a monster attacked her.
Children Protective Service came to take her away two months later. They put her in a foster home in Colorado where she met another Demigod. He became her best friend for the six months they were there together. They spent long afternoons talking about monsters and the gods. When the four months had passed he told her he was going to find the Wolf House and that she should go there when she was ready. Two lonely months later she followed the map he had given her, she fought monsters and slept in some pretty weird places she made it to the Wolf House. She journeyed to Camp Jupiter. She was claimed within the first month of being there. Her friend from the foster program spoke for her and she quickly worked her way to centurion. She continued to train everyday and became an incredible warrior. Her dedication to train everyday was what helped her focus her grief allowing her to be able to not let it out on her friends.

The first time she was noticed by a large amount of the campers was the night she got claimed. She was surrounded with a red aura for two days and she was overwhelmed with urges to go fight someone so she spent most of those two days working out. She was young to be claimed, but not to young. It was almost as if Mars was saying "Look at my kid, she fights good."

The second thing that got her noticed was that it only took her two months for her to become a legionnaire. She saved a kid from getting seriously injured by pulling him out of the way when Hannibal the Elephant randomly started charging during a war game. Her agility and fast reflexes made it so she was able to pull them both out of the way. This was her sixth war game. (I don't actually know how often there are war games)

The third thing that got her noticed was her war games skills. On her 8th war game she was sent a bit ahead of the troops with two companions to get into the fort and see that layout. She was the most fit for climbing the wall to get into the fort because of her parkour skills, she was sent up. She took out three guards on top of the wall, awarding her the Mural Crown for breaching the fort first. She was quick to build up a reputation. Her training sessions everyday in the arena made a couple high-up people turn their eyes over to see what she was doing. She continued to be an incredibly valuable player in the games and made plenty of allies (as well as a couple foes)  

Despite being fairly young Allie was determined to make Centurion ranking. She put in a ton of extra work to win the approval of her cohort mates. She put any grief that continued to cloud her mind to the side and gave Camp Jupiter her all. Thankfully Mars's blessing had allowed her to be able to fight even better. With more and more eyes on her she started to gain some wisdom while being under pressure.

On the eve of her 16th birthday her cohorts Centurion stepped down after being injured severally. They selected Allie and that became her biggest moment of Glory. She continues everyday working towards making herself a better leader and trying to be an inspiration to those around her.

Physical Appearance: Allie is 5'7'' with light brown hair and chocolate colored eyes. She weighs around 135lbs (mostly muscle weight) She has a flirtatious and challenging smile that she uses regularly. She usually wears black cargo pants and a white muscle tee. She had a leather jacket for colder weather. She wears combat boots while training and converse when she's just chilling around. She has multiple piercings (she got them during her time at Camp Jupiter) she wears a locket that has a picture of her little sister and her mother to inspire her to keep fighting. She has a red scarf that she wraps around her face while fighting to make her opponent focus more on her eyes.  

Personality: Allie is a funny person but she is also very intense. She's committed and passionate. She can be really headstrong and merciless in a battle (very roman) She's quick to smile and can be very flirtatious for a 14 yr old. She loves to make people laugh. She is cut out to be a natural leader, though she's still working towards becoming a better leader. She does whatever she can to make herself a better person. She is competitive. She's not a sore loser but she hates to lose.

Fatal Flaw: In battle she becomes very merciless. She will show no mercy to her opponent. This is fatal to her because if she ever crosses the same opponent twice, they will not show her mercy back. It also becomes something that affects her friendships. It hurts her as well off the battle field mostly in her relationships with other people. Most of the kids of Venus don't like her much because she doesn't let them slack during training. Because some of Venus's kids can get really nasty when they get mad there are ways they could hurt her.

Talents: She is unnaturally good with weapons. She doesn't overdo it though, she uses weapons strictly for fighting not showing off. She is really good when it comes to parkour and physical endurance training. She can also chug a 2 liter mountain dew in under 30 secs (ya know, just throwing that out there)

Weapons: She's kinda obsessed with weapons but does not have a magic item.
-Short Sword, set of throwing knives, dagger, spear(used for games)
She has no magic items because she already has Mars's blessing.

Other: She loves caffeine and fast paced music!

---------------------------------


Last edited by Marita Ashwood on Thu Mar 27, 2014 10:30 pm; edited 2 times in total

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Alala Fortis Empty Re: Alala Fortis

Post by Axel The Bunny Thu Mar 27, 2014 8:36 pm

The app looks pretty good, i only have a few problems with it.
First off i dont like the idea of your character making Centurion rank after only two years, especially since the first year would have been spent on Probatio, so maybe up the time she's been in camp and add a little to the background about her years in camp.
The fatal flaw is interesting, but I feel it has to affect her in some way outside of combat too, would she not take slack or hold others to higher standards because of this? or would it make her over competitive? A fatal flaw is a part of the character's personality, it isn't something left on the battlefield.

Cut down on the weapons a little, first off I dont see any practical way she could carry this many weapons into battle, so yea sorry but I'm shooting down the being skilled with 8 different weapons even if they aren't magical.
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Alala Fortis Empty Re: Alala Fortis

Post by Guest Thu Mar 27, 2014 10:10 pm

So I switched it so that she was at Camp Jupiter for four years. I gave her a lot more details about being in Camp Jupiter than I had originally. When adjusting her fatal flaw I tried to apply it more to camp life and her position as well as on the battle field. If you want me to adjust it more let me know.
I'm also having a hard time with the age limits. I was hoping that she could have an intense back story. The story is how I want it I just think the ages are a bit whack. I think it would be more ideal for my character to be 16 and have gotten to camp when she was 11. But if you want her to be 14 that's ok too.
Thanks for your consideration
-Marita

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Post by GeneralArin Thu Mar 27, 2014 10:20 pm

I don't mind her getting to camp at 11, but that means you had too many years at camp. Just to keep things somewhat fair, we don't want people to have a character 5 years or more at camp right off the bat. 
Then you can be 16 years old if you like, but what I mean is that newly claimed characters need to be 11-14. Being older is fine, so long as your character is already at camp.
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Alala Fortis Empty Re: Alala Fortis

Post by Guest Thu Mar 27, 2014 10:22 pm

That makes more sense, I'll edit it to fix that. I didn't really want my character to be there for more than five years anyways, I just think being a Centurion would be pretty freaking awesome. =)

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Alala Fortis Empty Re: Alala Fortis

Post by Axel The Bunny Fri Mar 28, 2014 1:40 am

Mars doesnt exactly hand out his blessing, not to mention the fact it is extremely rare. Frank had to take on a literal city's worth of monsters to get the blessing, so I'm gonna have to shoot that one down, as it simply doesn't seem fair to other RPers that your character magically has a skill boost.

I simply meant that you should revise your fatal flaw, not add more to it. Merciless isnt a personality trait. is she merciless due to her over competitiveness? or some other reason. Fatal flaw has to link to your personality. Also how would it lead to her death?

also as a side note realize your character really seems a little...overpowered. I mean agile, natural leader, incredibly skilled fighter, and skilled with multiple weapons.

try to limit your weapons, to three at the very most.
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Post by Guest Fri Mar 28, 2014 1:43 pm

Okay, so I'm going to have to edit this a lot. Originally I did not mean to write Centurion so if you want I can just have her be a legionnaire. I can take out the whole Mars's blessing too. So get rid of the Fatal Flaw and switch it too. I kinda made her unrealistic with the whole natural leader, so she doesn't have to be a Centurion she can just be agile and a good fighter. Yup... this might take a few days.

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Alala Fortis Empty Re: Alala Fortis

Post by Cerulaen Sat Mar 29, 2014 3:05 am

There's not necessarily anything wrong with being a natural leader, but you need to have some general character flaws to coincide with it, rather than be good at everything. Our characters are not perfect. xP As one writer eloquently put it, they rot and stink and grow. Or something like that. xP
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